First Published November 7, 2013
It’s been a peaceful day. I don’t mean that everything went smoothly because it didn’t. However, I haven’t felt stressed today. I’m not for sure that it isn’t because last Sunday was emotional for me, and I let myself cry. It’s been a while since I went on a crying jag. There’s something to say about releasing emotional stress. Today would have also been my Mother-in-law’s birthday. When I wrote the date on the board today, I said a sweet hello to her.
I like to think of myself as an optimist. I enjoy laughing and looking on the brighter side of life. It’s most likely the reason that has helped get me through these storms and handle this lonely life. I try not to whine about what’s going on in my life. I know many people have a much tougher life than I’m living and I’m thankful for my blessings.
When we were first married, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I’ve always enjoyed working with kids. When I was in second grade, I wanted to be a teacher and emulate Mrs. Hill. She was a positive person who made school fun! I didn’t keep that goal in front of me. I really wasn’t a good high school student. I never studied and all the moving I did as a child made me a reluctant student. It was my job working in a daycare that convinced me to go back to school to be a teacher. I loved working with young children.
About a year after we had Cam, John decided to go back to school to change his profession because he was tired of working retail with all the crazy hours and stress. It was a huge step in our life. We sold our home and moved in with his parents, so financially we could be able to go through the change. He suggested that I try taking a few classes to see how I felt about being a student again since we were in a situation that financially allowed me to try. I had no idea if I could do it. However, I absolutely loved learning and going to the classes. It was hard with him going to school full time, me part time and working, being parents to a toddler, and living in his parents’ home. Looking back, I wonder how we accomplished it. That in itself is a whole different story. God was definitely leading us down that path!
Emotionally, I’m stable. I’m relatively healthy and I adore my job as a teacher. I’ve been blessed with a wonderful, caring son who has a healthy outlook on life. We’ve never had to deal with substance abuse or emotional problems. Sometimes when I hear of a young person who has gone that route and the problems other parents face with the issue of drugs, I’m thankful for not having to deal with that heartache. We’ve never had to deal with educational or behavior problems. Whenever, I see students who have to overcome mental, emotional, or behavior issues, I thank God for Cameron.
Some people think that we might have had it hard with health issues. Even though we’ve had challenges with Cam’s health, we’ve also been blessed. His dialysis lasted less than a year and God put a kidney donor in our life quickly.
I really feel that God put Danielle together with Cameron as a gift. She called and said that through prayer God placed the desire to donate her kidney to him. Through all the years that their lives crossed in the past, I know God had a plan for them. Same church, same school. Her dad as his bus driver and a teacher at his high school and her mom and I working at the same district. Our God is a mighty God!
We’ve been blessed with insurance and financial help to offset the cost of medicine and medical expenses. Yes, I’ve had headaches trying to fill out the paperwork and correcting incorrect forms for Medicare, but the costs have not been so overwhelming that we haven’t been able to handle them. Even though I sometimes fret what’s going to happen when Cameron falls off my insurance and the Medicare time limit runs out, I’m sure that God will continue to provide. I don’t need to worry because I know God will take care of our future.
What’s in our future? I have no idea. I have plans and dreams that I would like to see fulfilled. I know God already knows how much time I have left on this earth and the consequences to the choices that I choose. Another day, month, year, or decades to live? Married or remaining single? Grandparent or not? Happy or . . .
I thank you, Lord, for whatever you give me.
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.